If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands? - Milton Berle

Before I was a Mom

I slept as late as I wanted and never worried about how late I got into bed. I slept all night and nothing could wake me.

Before I was a Mom

I never tripped over toys. I didn’t worry whether or not my plants were poisonous, my cleaning products stored away properly or my medicine cabinet locked.

Before I was a Mom

I had never been puked on, pooped on, spit on (except for this once, by my friend Lucy's firstborn), chewed on, or peed on. I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts.

Before I was a Mom

I never held down a screaming child so that doctors could do tests…or give shots. I never looked into teary eyes and cried. I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin. I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom

I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn’t want to put it down. I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn’t stop the hurt. I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much. I never knew that I could love someone so much. I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom

I didn’t know the feeling of having my heart outside my body. I didn’t know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby. I didn’t know that bond between a mother and her child. I didn’t know that something so small could make me feel so important.

Before I was a Mom

I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay. I had never known The warmth, The joy, The love, The heartache, The wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mom. I didn’t know I was capable of feeling so much before I was a Mom.

Before I was a Mom

I didn't realize how much time I had. I didn't know how to cook fresh vegetables. I didn't know many lyrics to lullabies. I didn't know I was this strong and patient. I did'nt know how to run on autopilot.

Before I was a Mom

I thought I understood people with kids - I didn't. I used to feel slightly alienated with couples that had kids. I used to babysit occasionally and was happy to return the kids to their rightful owners.

Before I was a Mom

I used to go see a play, a movie. I used to say I'd still be doing this or that even if I had kids. I used to meet with my single friends.

Before I was a Mom

I did not understand my parents.